The Proposal
by AiKo-Chan15
Summary: A series of Thiefshipping one-shots dedicated to those lovable villains "popping the question" rated T just to be safe
1. Chapter 1

This chapter will be the first of many proposals. I was challenged and accepted. I told my friend that I could think of at least fifty different ways for these characters to pop the question. She said "Bitch please no you can't" and then I turned into the Incredible Hulk (I don't own that) and smashed her face... except the last part didn't happen and I said I'd prove her wrong instead.

I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! How can I forget? My sister won't stop reminding me

This is the first Yu-Gi-Oh! fic I've *posted* so depending on reviews more might be on the way (other than this one).

* * *

The Fakeout

"Bakura! Hurry up, I've been waiting for a half an hour" This was crazy; Bakura never took this long to get ready. It was always the other way around. Marik was starting to get annoyed.

"I'll just be another minute, shut up!" He yelled from their room.

The two had been dating for two years now and in that time had gotten an apartment together.

"Marik, why do you have to be so bloody frusterating?"

_Now where have I heard that before?_ He thought….

It was back before they were together and they were in yet another fight. He had heard that exact same phrase before from Bakura.

"_Marik, why do you have to be so bloody frusterating?"_

But this fight would have VERY different results

_Flashback_

"_What the hell did I do?" Marik's tone was anything but calm, but he wasn't quite sure why he was so mad in the first place… No wait yes he did._

_He and Bakura decided to go out for lunch and the waitress GAVE HIM HER PHONE NUMBER! What a slut! He and Bakura weren't together or anything, but that didn't stop his blood from boiling when that skank decided she was going to throw herself at him._

_Maybe his thoughts would help him see reason_

_Maybe I'm being too harsh… Then he started to wonder if his yami still had that chainsaw…_

"_All I did was ask if you were going to call her back! What's so bad about that?" Bakura threw his hands up into the air, so annoyed he wanted to either hit Marik or kiss him so he'd shut up._

"_AFTER you "accidentally" threw it in a puddle and stepped on it"_

"…_yes"_

_Then Bakura lowered his head so his eyes were covered by his bangs, he spoke softer now "Tell me Marik-" he took a step closer, Marik stepped back and was up against the wall. "Why?" he got even closer, definitely invading Marik's "personal bubble"_

Marik took a minute to admire Bakura as he walked towards him "You know Kura, if you're trying to look sexier than me a couple extra minutes isn't enough, you know what? Don't worry about it; no one can look sexier than me and my gorgeous abs." Marik stood in front of his boyfriend proudly in his usual purple cut off shirt.

He was expecting some sort of smart ass remark about how Marik was a pretty face but couldn't outsmart a block of cheese.

Instead Bakura just looked at him; it was one of those looks that made Marik's heart flutter, the look that softened his eyes, but maintained the rough look. The look that made Marik want to kiss Bakura with everything he had.

The look that told him that Bakura loved him and all he saw was Marik.

"_I-I just told you I-" he froze when Bakura lifted a finger to his lips, then moved so that both his hands were on either side of Marik's head._

"_The REAL reason Marik" Bakura leaned in closer so that Marik could feel his breath._

_Needless to say, Marik wasn't exactly on planet Earth at the moment._

"_I-I just didn't think she was the kind of girl you should hang around I guess"_

_A smirk formed on Bakura's lips, but Marik still couldn't see his eyes as the other leaned over him._

"_I think you're lying" Marik's heart skipped a beat. And everything went silent._

"_I think that you were jealous Marik" still no response._

"_I think that you've been hiding something from me" _

He always managed to catch him off guard.

Bakura walked up to the tanned Egyptian and kissed him, Marik smiled into the kiss.

_When Marik still didn't respond Bakura just smiled at him and began to turn away. I guess he's still not ready to say- He suddenly felt something pulling at his hand._

"_Marik?" He didn't say anything, they both just stood there for a minute. _

"_I-I am" Bakura stood there in shock. "Are what?"_

"_Lying. I'm lying and I was angry and I am hiding something from you" His voice audibly shook with every word he spoke, it sounded as though he was about to cry._

_Bakura's heart felt like it was about to beat right through his chest. "Marik I-I didn't mean to get you worked up-"_

_But Marik just kept talking._

"_I HATE it when those girls hit on you and I don't want to share you with anyone else! I want to be near you all the time and it's killing me that I can't-"_

"_Marik, calm down and-" _

"_And at first I just wanted all of these feelings to go away and they wouldn't and it frusterates me everyday!"_

"_Marik just hold on a sec-"_

"_And I don't understand them! Because they make me feel happy and angry and scared all at once and everytime I see you it makes my heart race and-" He was really crying now and wouldn't pause when Bakura tried to talk to him._

"_What are you-"_

"_You're the only person that makes me feel this way! And I wanted to hate you for it; I really did but then…" Strong arms wrapped around him and his eyes widened, had he really just said all of that?_

"_Marik, don't cry, please." He lifted Marik's chin so they made eye contact. While Marik was trying to stop his sobs in his eyes and he saw the worry in Bakura's. _

_Those eyes that he loves so much…_

_The person they belong to… that he- he… maybe…?_

Bakura was always full of surprises, just like the first time they kissed…

_Damn I've just gotta get this over with!_

_Bakura had moved his hand from Marik's face. But now Marik was resting his hand on Bakura's cheek._

_Now those eyes were as wide as saucers as the tanned boy decided it was now or never. He wrapped both his arms around Bakura's neck and pressed their lips together._

_It was a gentle kiss, Marik broke contact reluctantly after a few seconds and Bakura was just standing there, still in shock._

_Then, he finally spoke and Marik winced, this would be the rejection that he dreaded. At least he told Bakura his feelings… that was really all he could do._

"_You shouldn't do things like that Marik" Marik felt a pain in his heart as the other said those words, keeping his head down, not noticing the smirk on the albino's face._

"_If you're going to kiss someone then do it right" His head snapped up just in time to have his lips crushed against Bakura's. He felt the other's tongue against his lips and parted them, deepening the kiss. They battled for dominance, Bakura just barely won and Marik made a mental note not to let that happen again._

_They pulled away only when something called oxygen was needed as their lungs began to burn._

"Ready to go?" Bakura asked as he pulled away, Marik nodded. His boyfriend was acting strangely today… no fights… no complaining…just quiet.

They made their way to Domino Square, on their way they passed Yugi and his friends. Bakura didn't try to start a fight with the pharaoh, or even trip him like he usually does. They just walk by pleasently as Ryou flashes his yami a knowing smile and winked.

What the hell is going on?

"Bakura? Are you alright?" This seemed to take the other off guard as he stumbled a bit.

"_Ra Marik, it's about time!"_

"_You… should… talk!" Marik took longer to catch his breath._

_Bakura just smirked and pulled the other to him, gently kissing his forehead._

"_Bakura?" Marik tilted his head up._

"_Yes?"_

"_I…love you"_

"_I love you too Marik"_

Marik smiled at the memory of that day, the day he told Bakura was the happiest day of his life. _I think I can top it_, the albino thought smugly.

"…I'm fine… Geez you tell me to shut up no you _want_ me to talk? Make up you're mind" Then he flashed his trademark smirk and Marik smiled back.

I guess I was worried for nothing… Still, Bakura seems tense today.

"Marik, hold up. My shoelace came undone"

"Awww Little Bakura can't tie a knot?"

"Its not that, some stupid kid managed to step on the lace"

Marik rolled his eyes and walked back as Bakura bent down on his knee in front of the fountain to reach his shoe.

An old lady walking by noticed this and gushed "Oh my, A proposal! How sweet!" Other people in the area started to group around the couple and watch the "proposal"

"Oh, no. He was just-" Marik started but he felt a tug on his sleeve and his eyes met Bakura's and the other whispered to him with a mischievous glint in his eye "Just go along with it" he winked.

"Marik, you once asked me why I love you. I told you it was because I was the only one who could put up with you."

"That was a lie. I love you because you get jealous when I get hit on, you always hog the blankets, you always need to be right, and you never give up the TV remote, you're loud, obnoxious, and never stop talking."

Bakura chuckled before continuing

"You always let me egg you on; you make me want to kill you when you call me "Kura" in public. You love god awful music that you insist on blasting through the apartment and you never take any less than an hour in the bathroom in the morning getting ready. I say I hate it but that's a lie too, because that's what makes you the man I fell in love with."

Marik blushed and a couple of people watching laughed; Bakura's face was serious again.

"You're better than anything I could have ever wished for. Before you I was alone, no one wanted me. You taught me how to see life as an adventure; you showed me how to care. You melted the hatred in my heart away and brought out a good side I didn't know I had. When I met you I thought you were the most beautiful person I had ever seen. Before I met you, I never realized how empty my life was. You're all I want, all I _need_. Marik, you're all I want to wake up to in the morning, and the only one I want to kiss goodnight."

Marik felt tears in his eyes, even though this wasn't a real proposal, he could tell Bakura meant every word.

"You have my whole heart, and I know that just being with you I'll be happy for the rest of my life knowing you'll always be with me."

_Damnit Marik don't cry! This isn't a real proposal!_ The tanned boy thought to himself as he felt his tears start to spill over.

Bakura held reached out for Marik's hand and continued "I've thought about how I was going to do this for a long time, and I'll admit I was terrified, but I knew I had to, _wanted_ to. I can't imagine life without you Marik. I realized I couldn't put all of my feelings down on paper, there wasn't anything strong enough. But I promise I'll spend the rest of my life showing you how I feel and doing whatever."

Marik started to tremble; he was weak in the knees.

"Give him the ring!" someone from the audience yelled out.

_Uh oh. _Marik thought, _I guess Bakura's little bit of "fun" is over_.

Marik decided they might as well fess up, Bakura knew what the other was thinking and smirked and his hand left Marik's only to reach into his pocket.

"No, I mean- uh- he doesn't-uh" Marik continued to try to find his words and was visibly flustered "I- uh mean um"

"Marik?"

He turned back to a still kneeling Bakura, and his heart felt like it stopped, then went into overdrive.

"Will you marry me?"

Bakura was holding a velvet box in his hand that he opened to reveal a beautiful diamond ring.

"B-but, you-and-that-your shoe-I – I"

"I want to give you everything, and I hope that this ring is a good start."

He noticed something in the crowd now, the person that yelled for the ring. Marik's mind was a mess right now, but he could recognize Ryou right away. In fact amoung the random bypassers, hardly any of them were random. All of their friends were there, his sister, his brother, his yami. Everyone was watching.

"Y-you are?"

Bakura smirked, understanding what he meant

"I am"

It was all real, Bakura was really proposing to him. The way he was acting, why he brought him here, the ring… the beautiful ring, and the beautiful man holding it. The man who just told him he wants to spend their lives together. His mind was even more chaotic now.

"I'm waiting"

"Huh?" Marik was snapped out of his daze, Bakura sounded like a weird mix of impatient and amused at Marik, who looked a little dopey.

"For your answer, Marik" His voice held so much emotion that it caused Marik's words to get caught in his throat.

Then he was back to reality. Bakura was in front of him, telling him that he loved him in the most beautiful way possible and was waiting for Marik to answer.

But he was too choked up on his words to say anything. He nodded frantically and Bakura chuckled, placing the ring on Marik's finger.

"There now, was that so hard? Really Marik, you almost had me worr-mmmh" Marik had all but tackled his new fiancé into a bruising kiss that the other accepted whole-heartedly.

When they pulled back they gazed into each other's eyes and Marik could swear he saw tears of joy in Bakura's eyes, which the latter would later deny.

Their friends all surrounded and congradulated them. But there was nothing that could make them break eye contact.

Then Bakura's expression shifted to a smug one and whispered "What day is the best of your life now, bitch?"

The other just replyed "I guess you're just going to have to raise the bar for the next time then"

"Good, I already have the perfect day in mind"

"Bakura?"

"Yes?"

"I love you"

"I love you too, Marik"

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REVIEW! Tell me what you think. Please! I'm so nervous about people liking this one because I got really got excited about it. Come to think about it I probably decided to post this because of Little Kuriboh and the Evil Council 5 video (tear)

Ideas are welcome too! Don't hold back! Opinions are more than welcome.

Enough sadness! Time for happy!

"I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."

I just now realized that's funny for everyone but me...


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

Why do the disclaimers always make me feel like a failure?

I also don't own Dracula or Frankenstein (you'll understand why I had to disclaim these later)

Here's a thought: why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

Okay sleep deprived mind aside this is the second chapter in my fifty chapter proposal fic. I had others written and ready to go but I wanted to get this one out first for some reason. I hope you like it!

* * *

Cheater?

"Who is Britney?" Marik shot his boyfriend a glare as he stalked over to the couch Bakura was currently sitting on.

"What the bloody hell are you talking about?" The other looked up, annoyed, especially now that Marik had effectively pulled the book he was reading out of his hands.

"Britney, you know, the girl who gave you her number yesterday on the bar napkin? That Britney." His voice was calm, yet at the same time held pure anger and betrayal, yet at the same time praying that his boyfriend hadn't cheated on him.

He watched the thief's face for a moment, first annoyed, then confused, then annoyed again until…

Realization.

"I said I didn't mind when you went out with Melvin for his Bachelor party, Ryou convinced me that you'd both behave yourselves. He trusted his fiancé, but I suppose I don't have that luxury with _my_ boyfriend"

"What?" the other said deadpanned.

"Well, you're out of luck because I called and she gave you a fake number anyway." Marik planted his hands on his hips, looking like he was about to cry.

Flashback

_Marik was doing the laundry that Bakura decided to leave on the floor again, when he found a small piece of paper when he was emptying the pockets. _

"_A phone number? B-Bakura didn't try to pick up a girl last night did he?" He knew he had to get to the bottom of this. He was just going to talk to Bakura and have his explaination._

_Too bad life is too much of a bitch for that._

_He walked out into the living area "Hey Bakura I-" But he stopped when whatever papers were in the man's hands were hastily hidden behind his back. He had brushed it off and left the room before Marik could say anything else. _

_THEN, the same thing had happened, except this time he had been on the phone with someone and hung up when Marik entered the room with a hasty "I'll talk to you later"_

_Was Bakura cheating on him?_

_He walked over to the phone and looked at the caller ID. He HAD to know, he loved Bakura more than anything else in the world and trusted him, but something was up. To his horror the number on the caller ID had been repeatedly dialed over the past few WEEKS, and it matched the number on the napkin. _

_He dialed._

"_Pick up the phone bitch, I fucking DARE you"_

"_Millennium Jewelers, our memories last a thousand years, how can I help you?"_

"_Uh… I'm sorry, must have been the wrong number… sorry"_Did he dial right?

"_He was probably blown off. The bastard deserves it."_Maybe I should check, just in case_. He was about to call again when the phone started ringing itself. He pressed 'TALK'_

"_Hello?"_

"_Hi!" said a cheery voice on the other line, definitely female. "Is Mr. Bakura at home at the moment?"_

_Marik clenched his fists "And WHO may I ask is calling"_

"_Tell him it's Britney from-"but she was cut off as Marik hung up the phone._

"I guess you're not the "player" you thought you were because it was some store instead"

He looked to the other for a reaction but his eyes were hidden behind his bangs "Marik?"

"What now?" he said, venom in his voice.

"What store did you call?" Marik looked confused, _why does that matter_?

"I don't know, some jewelry store, look don't try to defend yourself because it won't help"

He actually _did_ expect Bakura to try to defend himself, or to get mad at him for snooping, but the other just thought for a moment. "…Britney, she called yesterday?"

The other nodded, wondering where this was going, but was surprised when Bakura got up off of the couch and walked out the door.

Marik stood there, stunned. Too stunned to even move.

That night, he was trying to leave, he _really_ was, but he just _couldn't_.

The other hadn't said he actually did anything. What if he had been wrong and Bakura was mad at him?

Then again… he was being really secretive.

Life sucks sometimes.

"I'll talk to him tomorrow…" he yawned as he drifted off to sleep, small tears in his eyes. He didn't hear the door close as a shadowed figure walked up and kissed his forehead.

"Yes Marik, tomorrow…" Bakura chuckled and placed an object on the table opposite the side Marik slept.

Morning

When Marik woke up he noticed that Bakura wasn't there, then he saw the other's clothes on the floor and concluded that he had just gone out early. He lazily got out of bed and walked into the bathroom.

He looked tired.

He looked sloppy.

He looked **_dead_**.

Marik's hair was a complete wreck, his baggy long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants hung loosely on his body. Heavy bags were under his eyes and his complexion was pale and drained. "No more late nights, sucks too much to wake up"

Then he remembered WHY he had been up so late and was instantly put in a bad mood.

"Bakura…" his eyes narrowed and became an all out glare when the phone started to ring.

_I'm really starting to hate phones_. "Speak of the devil" he looked and saw it was Bakura who was calling, Marik considered ignoring it, but eventually decided to pick up the phone.

"What the hell?" he yelled into the speaker.

"Well good morning to you too sunshine." The voice on the other line was about as cocky as a person could get.

"Why did you leave yesterday? Why wouldn't you answer me?" Scratch that previous statement, his _laugh_ just beat out the tone of his already haughty voice.

"I had… business to attend to, look, I need a favour." Marik's nose wrinkled as he considered just saying no and hanging up, but Bakura's next word kept him on the phone.

"…please?"

"What do you want?"

"I left the ring on my dresser; I need you to get it for me."

_Bakura never leaves the Millennium Ring off, what the hell is with him lately?_

"I'll get it and call you back then" He was just about to put the phone down when he heard the other shout.

"NO!... I mean, don't, stay on the phone until you have the ring"

"…Whatever" was his only reply.

The tanned boy walked back into their bedroom. _Now, where is the ring? Wait-_

"Your ring's not on the table"

This was met with another chuckle, "Oh it's not _mine_, Marik, and I think you'll find its there."

"Bakura, the only thing on the table is a little box"

"Exactly." He could _feel_ the smirk on the other end.

"In the box?"

"Yes, go get it"

Marik rolled his eyes and walked over to the tiny box and picked it up in one hand.

"Okay, now what?" _What kind of game is he playing?_

"Well Marik lets solve this one together shall we? What's the best way to see what's inside of a box? Now, use your brain for this one, it's a toughie."

His eye twitched as he shook his head. He moved the phone so it was wedged between his shoulder and the side of his head as he opened the lid.

Many things happened at once in that moment.

Marik gasped.

The phone dropped to the floor.

And a camera flashed.

"That's not… your ring" He nearly jumped when a pair of strong arms snaked around his waist and held him close. Bakura whispered in his ear "That's right, its not. _Hmmm_ who's could it be?" All of the colour drained from Marik's face and his stomach tightened into a knot. Sitting in the box was a diamond ring. (I'll let you decide what you want it to look like)

"Only two people live here… so if it's not _mine_, it must be yours Marik" He nibbled on the other's ear. "That is, if you want it"

"W-what?"

"You know, I'm rather glad that I don't have to talk to that annoying bitch anymore, although she did help quite a bit when it came time to order this thing"

"Y-you…?"

"I swear we looked through catalogs for weeks, but none were really good enough… Had to end up doing the whole 'custom order' thing"

"Is this..?" He looked up at Bakura; the other had a smile on his face, not a smirk, a genuine smile.

"Although I would've loved to see my jealous _fiancé_ have a smack-down with the jewelry store staff. _That _would've been entertaining."

"F-fiancé?" A mock look of realization overtook Bakura as the smirk returned to his face.

"Oh that's right! I haven't asked yet, silly me." He unwrapped his arms from the boy and faced him.

"Marik, you are a jealous bitch and it was _really_ fucking hard to keep this a surprise" he got down on one knee.

"Lemme tell you, Ra, you are lucky I love you so much, otherwise I'd have to kill you. But I _do _love you. I love you so much that I would want nothing more than to spend every day pissing you off. You know I'm not good with this mushy shit, but I always knew that you were the one I wanted to be with, since the first moment I met you in Battle City. Of course you were wearing your slutty little hoodie, that didn't hurt anything that's for sure."

Marik opened his mouth to talk but Bakura put a finger to the other's lips "Let me finish" he nodded and Bakura continued.

"I know I don't appreciate you enough, I don't deserve everything you've done for me, everything you _are_. I probably never will. I still won't do laundry, and I refuse to clean toilets, it's disgusting and it's not going to happen. But you hog the sheets _and_ the remote, so I think that balances out… pretty much. This isn't a good proposal, but it's the best I've got, believe me, I thought a _lot_ about what I was going to say and this was the _good_ version.

Please know that all I want is you, I'd die without you, Marik. I can only pray that you love me the same way. Marik Ishtar, will you marry me?"

He removed his hand from the boy's mouth to let him speak, but the other was quiet. Still shell shocked "So… you're not cheating on me?"

Bakura rolled his eyes "No Marik"

"…And this ring… Is mine 'cuz you're asking me to marry you?"

The thief simply nodded this time.

"And you won't clean toilets?"

He laughed at that one "Marik, will you just answer the question?"

He seemed to snap out of his stupor and lunged at Bakura, knocking them both to the ground. "Fuck yes!"

They both laughed before crushing their lips together in a kiss. "That has got to be one of the most fucked up proposals I've ever heard"

Bakura made a face "That better have been the ONLY one you've ever heard or people are going to die"

His lips curled as he slid the ring onto his fiancé's finger "Perfect" It was Marik who spoke.

"Yes you are" Bakura looked at him through lidded eyes.

"I meant the ring"

"I didn't"

Marik smiled at his love, trying to remember ever detail of this moment.

Then he remembered what he looked like.

"Ugh! Did you have to do this when I looked like the child of Frankenstein and Dracula?"

"But that's the fun!"

Then something dawned on him _that flash from before…_

"Bakura? Why do you have a camera?"

"I love you Marik"

* * *

Review! It makes me happy and motivates me to write faster. I hope this was a good chapter, but I also have a question for those of you who bother to read my story. Do you think I should do a parody of –ahem- a certain story (not going to tell you the idea) and end up with Marik and Bakura getting married and count that as one of the fifty?

I dunno its up to the readers, but only those who review.

And remember kids…

Children in the back seat cause accidents… accidents in the back seat cause children!


	3. Chapter 3

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

I was late with my updates, I was on vacation. Sue me, New York is time consuming. I DON'T OWN Yu-Gi-Oh! If I did the Thiefshipping would not be so subtle.

I kinda made this one end quick just to update, tell me if you like it The title will make sense later.

Three down…Forty-seven to go!

(I have number 50 planned and it makes so much sense!)

* * *

Mugged

"Geez, you'd think a thief would be able to keep track of his things." Marik grumbled as he walked down the narrow street, he had lent the albino his cell phone for the day after he had forgotten his at the apartment and had returned without it. Bakura had said he was sure where it was… he just insisted Marik go and get it himself. The tanned boy had argued at first but Bakura would not budge, he said he was tired and not going out again, so reluctantly, the tomb keeper set out to retrieve his phone.

"What a jerk!" Marik kicked the dirt as he reached the street he loved Bakura that much was obvious, but he was still pissed at how easy he could be manipulated.

Suddenly, Marik had an idea; he had taken Bakura's phone once they had gotten back, as a way to get him back for losing Marik's, but now it could actually help him.

He could call his phone!

It was so ingenious that only he could of thought of something so incredible!

It helped to boost his ego while living with the ex-tomb robber…

Condescending bastard…

_Anyway Marik, FOCUS_! He thought as he hit the speed dial button. He smiled when his name came up even before Ryou's or even an emergency line. Bakura had told him that he loved him many times through their years together, even more recently, but it always made Marik smile at this small action. Bakura may act tough, but he was a softie at heart.

But he was a softie that lost his friggin phone!

The dial tone began and Marik strained to hear a faint ringing that seemed to be coming from an alleyway. This place seemed strangely familiar, his brain was telling him that it was somewhere important, but he couldn't place it. He walked by a couple boxes, wondering how the hell his phone had ended up in an alleyway. Did someone steal it?

He knew having a thief for a boyfriend would bite him in the ass someday, karma was a bitch.

But why was it being a bitch to him!?

The alley was dimly lit, especially because it was so late in the day, but he was determined. Bakura was so sure that Marik wouldn't be able to find the phone, his teasing was relentless.

Now he HAD to find it.

The ringing caused him to turn a corner. Seriously, had he been here before? Maybe with his motorcycle? Did something happen here? Someone?

…Oh well…

The ring had ended and he had to redial again all of a sudden he heard Bakura's ringtone. It was "Cuppycake". He had only set it to bug him, now every time the song came on he laughed like crazy, sure he had gotten some weird stares, but it was worth it. He saw the phone at last, right in the middle of the alleyway. This part seemed the most familiar to him.

It was surrounded by crates and brick walls, not really something special.

Except the feeling he got while being here. He didn't have much time to ponder this

Nine times out of ten Bakura was teasing him to get something from him, whether it was a reaction, or to make him fall for

… a trick…

Huh…..

…fuck

Could he have fallen for one of Bakura's tricks? No, he wouldn't do that. Why would he risk losing a phone just to mess with him? That would be totally retarded; Bakura would have to be the biggest idiot on the face of the planet.

Then again…

He didn't have time to ponder this for long as he was roughly shoved up against the brick wall, not to the point where his face was squished, but facing it. He saw a knife being pulled in his peripheral vision and tensed up. Finally the muffled low voice spoke.

"You are Marik Ishtar?"

He was so terrified he could only nod. He suddenly wished that he still had the Rare Hunters around. The tanned boy squirmed, trying to break free, but the knife was pulled up to his throat and he swallowed. He was completely still. _What's going on_? He thought, still in shock.

"Just stay where you are and don't move, got it?"

Marik was in the midst of trying to formulate an escape route,

Although the knife was really persuading him to stay.

"W-What do you want?" The voice chuckled and Marik shivered, that laugh just felt so…EVIL. Like he had a perfect plan and nothing could deter him. Like he had all of the confidence in the world, like he knew the situation inside and out and Marik was at his complete mercy. Like his arrogance and power was unmatched by anyone.

"There is a bit of…information I need from you, and your answer will determine whether I let you leave this alley or not, got it?"

"Why should I tell you anything?" He spat.

The knife got closer to his throat, but he didn't realize that the hand that had been holding him had moved to his back, sliding up and down, tracing the carvings made by the Tomb Keeper's initiation, now normally Marik would've noticed someone touch his back, but the knife had caught him off guard.

He gritted his teeth as he exhaled.

"That's better, now, you are a tomb keeper?"

Marik nodded

"But you abandoned your duties?"

Another nod

"And you love the Tomb Robber that used to reside in the Millennium Ring? The very one that you were supposed protect the items from?"

"LEAVE HIM OUT OF THIS!" The knife pressed closer "Answer the question, Marik! Do you love your thief?"

"Yes"

"Good, good…" The mystery man seemed to ponder this as he leaned in closer to the tanned Egyptian. Marik couldn't see his face in his peripheral vision, it was covered by a black hood, but he felt the hot breath on his neck and moved to pull away, but now his forehead was leaning on the wall, partially because he was being forced to by this mysterious stranger, but also because it was the only thing holding him up, his knees were so weak from fear he was sure that without this support he would collapse.

"Now, this question is the most important of all do you understand? Answer truthfully, and remember I might not let you leave here."

"…"

"What's the friggin question!?"

Another chuckle, but this time he could feel the vibrations from the stranger. "So impatient…" He reached around with his free hand and moved it to rest on the opposite shoulder. Then dragged it to the crook of the boy's neck and let it rest there.

"Now, Marik, do you have any idea as to why you are here?"

He shook his head this time "Was that the question?"

He took the silence as a no.

Suddenly the hand moved down to Marik's hand and entwined their fingers "Your thief has desired something for quite some time, do you know what that is?"

The Millennium items? Revenge on the pharaoh? Bakura had already given up on those things in order to live his new life with Marik… _What could Bakura want_?

"…No"

"…No, of course not, your thief has hidden it very well, there was no way you could've known…"

"Then why a-?"

Then everything clicked in his head Marik suddenly recognized the muffled voice, he was about to interrupt the man when suddenly he remembered this place.

_The place where I met Bakura_….

He felt a smile find his way to his face before he could stop it, their meeting didn't exactly scream 'true love' but that's what made them special. It said weird, original, imperfect.

The stranger slid something onto Marik's finger and brought the hand in front of the boy's face.

"Tell me something Marik…"

Suddenly he was a little less scared when the man spoke this time.

"Would you marry your thief?"

Now it was Marik's turn to chuckle "You set me up from the beginning…" He was finally allowed to turn and see the man who had held him captive in more ways than one.

Bakura.

"You scared the crap out of me, do you know that?" Marik's voice was very gentle, not angry like the albino had predicted.

Then the boy looked at his hand and tears welled up in his eyes, it was a gold ring with a red ruby in the middle.

"It was my mother's" The other interrupted Marik's thoughts. "from my father, it was the only thing I was able to save, it took a bit of shadow magic, but I knew that it was the only one that would be special enough to give to you." The shock on Marik's face was evident. Then the boy remembered the question and saw the finger the ring was on.

"Wait… you're…. asking me to…marry you?" Marik could barely believe the words themselves as Bakura gave only a nod, completely serious.

He could tell the thief was nervous; he doesn't usually put himself on the line like this and was fighting the urge to run.

Marik smiled.

Then thought of everything that had just happened.

This had been stupid, crazy, terrifying, crazy, creepy, nightmarish, crazy, infuriating, crazy, and oh right CRAZY.

That IDIOT had made Marik so nervous he could barely breath and now he was asking him to marry him?

"You're fucking crazy, how could I say no?"

"Good answer" He grinned mischievously "now I won't let you leave" He still acted arrogant, but Marik could practically FEEL the other's relief.

"…What? Why?"

Bakura pouted, "Because I had to fake mug someone today and instead I gave my victim a ring, I think the least I could do is… _take advantage_ of my prey."

Marik rolled his eyes

It was so random… so stupid… so imperfect.

That's just it.

It was so _im_perfect…

That it was.

Now all he could think of was the _"imperfect"_ perfect things they would do together.

For the rest of their lives.

And in this alley…

* * *

Florence I hope you are happy because I had to add a quick ending to get this up tonight, so don't blame me if it sucks. Suzaku is no longer the only one aware of my secret identity… Florence knows too! DUNDUNDUHHHHHHH. On the bright side she is now a thiefshipper, downside is she likes psychoshipping too. Viva la Deathshipping/ Thiefshipping!...Tender and Bronze are acceptable but not the best… She said I was a good writer…BEFORE SHE KNEW THIS FIC WAS WRITTEN BY ME! It was life an in person review!

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

Please Review, I love the people who review and they are the reason I write.


	4. Chapter 4

I am awful. Fact. I am a loser. Also a fact. I haven't updated in forever and that is worthy of torture. Absolutely

I'm realllllllyyyyyy sorrrrrryyyyyy I've had this sitting around for a bit and just didn't have time to finish it, like all of my chapters it just sat around half done for awhile until I found the time. I'm getting back into my routine though so hopefully I can get back on track with this story.

I DON'T OWN Yu-Gi-Oh! Or the characters, or anything.

* * *

Disaster

"I'm so bored!" Marik was sitting at home, while Bakura was at work.

Marik had his own job too, he wasn't _that_ lazy, but Bakura had been taking every shift possible. It had shocked Marik enough to think that his boyfriend had actually _gotten_ a job let alone _wanted_ to work.

Marik had gotten upset at Bakura a few months ago because he never honestly bought ANYTHING. It had thrown Bakura off guard; he could tell that Marik was bothered by it, not because he stole, no. In fact, Marik loved that Bakura was still able to cause trouble without the pharaoh getting involved. The boy was upset because no _effort_ or _thought _went into what he took; the things never had any meaning. Bakura could just randomly see a CD that he would take just on impulse, from a band he hated.

So the thief had taken on a couple jobs in the past few months (most of which he was fired from for obvious reasons), Marik assumed it was to prove something, he didn't mean to make Bakura feel bad.

Bakura was now holding a job at the museum. Marik had to practically _begged_ Ishizu to give him a job, and to her surprise, he was actually good at it. He hoped that the former spirit wasn't mad at _him_ now. He had been working so much it almost seemed like Bakura was _avoiding_ him.

_What would he even need to buy? _

At The Museum

"Just leave those boxes there Bakura" _I never expected him to be doing this…well_. Ishizu had been helping the albino unload the truck_. I guess this is really important to him_.

"Sure." Came her reply. Bakura wasn't a people person, she knew that. That's why she had him working behind the scenes. Her brother had initially asked her to give his boyfriend a job, but that wasn't why she had said yes. She knew Bakura wasn't going to cause anymore (serious) trouble, but that didn't mean that she wasn't nervous having someone with the title of Thief King in her museum, not to mention the fact that he still had shadow magic at his disposal.

She thought back to how she decided to give him a job

Flashback

"Please sister? For me? Bakura won't cause any trouble, and he really wants a job" Marik was, for about the tenth time that day, begging his sister. She had said she would think about it and was trying to stall for time as much as possible.

"I just need to think about it Marik, why does Bakura even want a job anyway?" Ishizu knew about Bakura's real 'job' but that didn't mean she approved.

"I'm not sure, but he's been trying really hard and I want to help him in any way I can if this is what he wants to do"

_I swear Marik is so in love with that boy he wouldn't think twice about jumping off a bridge for him_.

Ishizu smiled at her brother "Marik I have work to do, I promise I will consider it, I'm just not sure"

The boy nodded and left the room. _What could he possibly want a job for_? (Note: Can anyone guess?)

She couldn't believe it, Bakura must know he would be working for _her_, she would be his boss. They were civil towards one another, but that didn't mean that they were winning any friendship awards anytime soon. _I really wish I knew_…

And her wish came true.

With a knock at her door.

"Bakura? What are you doing here?" The boy had the expression of a deer caught in headlights; she almost thought he was Ryou until he composed himself.

"I, uh, need to speak with you." _He's never that polite_.

He continued "Marik… spoke to you… about a job? I, uh, didn't mean to have him do that, he didn't tell me, I would have-"

"What do you want Bakura?" Her tone was a bit harsh, but she knew he was up to something, and that put her on guard.

The usually confident boy flinched and spoke again after clearing his throat, regaining some of his usual sureness.

"A job, whatever you need me to do I will, I've tried odd jobs around town and I have some money saved up, but it's not enough." He paused for a moment, his fists clenched and his knuckles were white, preparing for his next word. "Please?"

Ishizu was taken aback by this, had _BAKURA_, King of Thieves, Spirit of the Millenium Ring, self proclaimed Master of the Shadows…

Just said please?

She was too in shock to say anything but "Why?"

He lowered his head, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks. This was Bakura right? Whatever he's going to say must be important.

"I'm looking to buy something for Marik… that was another thing I needed to speak with you about… I know you and Odion are his only remaining family, and it was important that I talked to you about this…"

He took a deep breath "I-I know that you don't like me all that much, but… Marik means the world to me, _more_ than that. He's the reason I even bother to get up in the morning and he's the reason I'm here now"

"I don't follow" Ishizu was confused alright, and for someone who prided herself on being in the know, this was new to her. Bakura never acts like this; he's usually a pompus ass, not someone who talks about their feelings and looks so…fragile.

She knew if he could read her mind she'd be dead right now.

He cursed under his breath. "What I'm saying is… I love Marik. I only want what's best for him and, I don't ever want to be apart from him. I want to show him that, so… I was going to use the money for, um" he took a breath

"with your permission I-"

"Marik's very important to me so-"

"I just wanted to ask if I could- you know, with a ring"

Ishizu obviously saw his speech issues and surprised herself by laying a comforting hand on his shoulder and nodded so he would continue.

He gulped "I would like your permission to ask Marik to marry me" He closed his eyes, practically feeling the 'no' he would ask Marik anyway, but his sister's approval may tip the scales.

And that was something he would not allow.

Ishizu breathed, she should have seen this coming, Odion had even joked about when it would happen and even wanted to take bets.

But she never expected Bakura to ask her first.

She saw his freak out and decided to speak "Bakura, you and I haven't gotten along very well, and I don't approve of most of your behaviours. To put it bluntly, when I first met you I thought you were nothing but a bad influence on my brother"

His nails were digging into his skin so hard he drew blood.

"But-" when she spoke again his head snapped up.

"I also know that you make him very happy, and you're obviously willing to work hard. I'm impressed that you asked for permission."

"Does that mean…?"

She continued "That means, I'm saying that you'd better work the hardest you've ever in your life. No being rude to customers, you will be paid minimun wage, you will work the hours I tell you, WHEN I tell you. Understand?" she had a small smile on her face as the boy went into shock.

The biggest smile Ishizu had ever seen on ANYONE was now on Bakura's face, only to be corrected into a smirk.

"I guess I'll see you on Monday then… _Onee-chan_" he got up and walked to the door.

Ishizu yelled out as he walked out to the sidewalk.

"If you ever hurt my brother you're dead!"

Without turning around he gave her a thumbs-up and continued walking home.

So, that brings us to the present. Bakura had been asking for as many hours as possible to cover his upcoming purchase. He was excited to say the least, but there was also a nervousness that felt like it was going to tear him apart, he dreaded rejection from his love. He had just about enough money.

He had everything planned out; he had chosen the one he would buy. A beautiful diamond ring with a silver band he had ordered about a month back.

It had meaning; he had worked for it to show Marik how much he cared without actually embarrassing himself by saying it.

…That he was also proving the other wrong was just a bonus.

He just had to finish his shift and he would be off to the mall. Odion had been relatively easy to ask, especially after dealing with Ishizu, it was easier after the first time.

"Bakura?" he looked up, Ishizu was looking at him, a small smile on her face.

"Good luck"

_Damn! How the hell am I so nervous?! It's all Marik's fault, I find it fun to torment small children in my spare time so why is this so hard?_!

Bakura was currently sitting on his and Marik's bed. On his lap the ring was resting harmlessly in its box, he was staring intently at it.

"Its gotta be special, maybe the- "

He froze as he heard the doorknob start to turn. His eyes widened as he jammed the box into his pocket and grabbed a random book so he could pretend he was reading.

"There you are! I've been looking for you for hours! Ishizu said after your shift finished you were going to the mall"

The tanned boy watched his lover, curious about his behaviour. "What have you been doing all this time?"

_Oh just planning out how I'm going to ask you to spend the rest of your life with me… no big deal, how 'bout pizza?_ "Oh, well, uh, just reading…?" it sounded like a question.

"Oh yeah?"

"Y-Yeah"

"Then why is the book upside down?"

Bakura's eyes widened as he realized his mistake. _Damn! Why can't I think straight?! This isn't like me_.

"I was just waiting for you to get back, it was boring" he threw the book to the side, hoping to distract the blond, lest he be caught.

Marik still looked suspicious and carefully moved to sit on the bed next to his lover.

_Big mistake Marik_.

Bakura smirked and pulled him into a chaste kiss before pushing him down onto the bed, straddling his waist, trying to distract him. The pale man knew he had won; there was no way Marik could still be wondering about-

"What's in your pocket?" His stomach twisted into a knot as he was found out, Marik's hands had moved to Bakura's hips, only to notice the box he had shoved in his pocket. "Can you just tell me what you're hiding?" He crawled off the tanned boy and sat on the bed, almost pouting.

Almost.

It was alright, he could still save himself here, he could use all of that cunning he had aquired from being a thief, all his life experience from those thousands of years to throw this bratty teen off his trail.

"I don't wanna"

…cunning…thief…yeah…

Marik rolled his eyes and stood up, "Fine, be a baby. I'm going to go make dinner what do you want? Or is formula all your sensitive tummy can handle?" the line was drawn when he started the baby talk. He wasn't going to cowar away from this; HE was the only one who was allowed to be that condecending.

He stood up and walked to the door, completely passing Marik. "We're going out" He grabbed his black trench coat. "Hurry up and get ready"

The younger man stood in the doorway, dumbfounded. _Who pissed in his cereal this morning?_

"Millennium?" Marik stood in front of the resturant slightly confused. "This looks really expensive… and isn't this a vegetarian place?"

Bakura grumbled something about meat haters and replied "Yes. You don't eat meat and I thought you'd like this. I decided to make today special since I've been busy the last little while and wanted to spend some time alone."

The tanned boy smiled, not a smirk, but a real smile as he kissed Bakura on the cheek and the other's face darkened considerably. "Thanks fluffy" He pulled away and skipped ahead. Bakura continued at a leisurely pace, content just watching Marik and his childlike ways.

"Hey Bakura?" Marik stopped walking and turned around.

"What?"

"If we're in Japan… how can we go to a resturant in San Fransisco?"

Bakura shrugged "The author thought the name was perfect and decided it wasn't worth questioning" (forth wall breaking ftw)

"So does that mean _we're_ not supposed to question it?"

"Exactly"

…

Dinner came and went and Bakura led Marik outside to the sidewalk, no one was around and the scene was perfect. Marik was about to walk towards the bike (Marik refused to use any other mode of transportation) when Bakura caught his arm. "Just a minute Marik. I need to say something."

"Is there something wrong?" Bakura looked too serious, Marik became worried, and whenever the smirk left the other's face it usually meant something was wrong.

Of course the look of worry on Marik's face made Bakura forget whatever he was about to say, I mean, he was just too damn cute! (And now Bakura is thinking words like cute… can you say whipped?)

"I-urm- uh just- uh wanted to- uh…" he trailed off and went into panic mode _Shit! What was I gonna do? I had all this memorized, what the hell happened?_!

He fumbled for the ring in his pocket as he started to back up from Marik, hoping the distance would help clear his head as he continued to stutter.

Unfortunately, at that moment a car (That suspiciously looked like Melvin's) decided to zip by and splash a puddle, soaking Bakura from head to toe. He dropped on his butt, feeling defeated.

"…Forget it…"

"Fluffy! You're all wet; you'll friggin' freeze to death!" Marik's look of concern only increased from before and now Bakura was at a loss of what to do. Marik wrapped his jacket around the boy and helped him up. "C'mon! Let's go make some hot chocolate! Oh! Oh! Oh! And I'll go get those colourful marshmallows and watch a movie and-" Bakura started tuning him out as he was left to his own thoughts.

_Why are you acting so stupid! You can't even ask one little question and HE'S the one taking care of YOU? How pathetic! What happened to the Great Thief King? His days of overcoming obstacles, doing what he wanted, not caring what happened…? Where did that person go? _Bakura throught as Marik brought him up to their apartment and started humming to himself as he made the drinks.

Bakura thought about just proposing right then, but he wanted to make this special for the boy. Tonight he would just curl up on the couch and hold the boy close.

_I'll try again later_

Ah, yes, the great and mighty Thief King Bakura was no more, something had melted away the hatred and vengence from his ancient heart… _What happened to that thief?_

He smiled as his thoughts answered for him.

_He fell in love_.

* * *

Okay so, who wants to kill me? I really wouldn't mind at this point I'm awful for not writing for so long but school is a bitch sometimes and doesn't want me to do things that make me happy. This story is going to be a mini series so yes there will be a conclusion and the next chapter will just continue on. Hopefully I will have it out very soon. Please review, I don't really deserve it, but the motivation might help.

So… What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick! Lol (That was weak I know but hey, whatcha gonna do?)


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh!

I'm sorry about my timing, things have happened and… well I'll just be able to devote a lot more time to my stories now, even the Death Note ones (I also don't own that). I promise the next chapters will be better. Love goes out to all of those who read this story and have reviewed.

* * *

THE DISASTER PART 2

Bakura opened his eyes and groaned, all of that work had amounted to nothing. He still hadn't proposed. What was he going to do? If- if he says no, I could lose everything, I could lose him forever. He made a mental note to kill whoever that car belonged to.

Just the thought made Bakura feel like his heart was being ripped from his chest. Was this the best idea after all? If Marik didn't want to get married then, he may not want to see Bakura anymore, knowing they want different things. Marik was his everything, before Marik, he was alone, lost in his own hatred. When he met Marik his whole world lit up and suddenly the sun had risen on him and just for him. Their friendship became love and that love was returned, even now being with Marik would be frusterating, and fun and wonderful. Bakura hadn't known life could be so beautiful before he had met this blond angel. His angel.

He could never say anything so sappy to Marik, which made this whole thing that much more difficult. He had only really told the boy that he loved him a handful of times, Marik knew of course, and he also knew how hard it was for Bakura to say things like that. It made those few words precious to the younger man, though he still longed to hear it.

Bakura looked over to the object of his affections and was at a loss for words. Marik was still asleep, his head resting on the pillow, lips slightly parted, his slow breaths hypnotic as the sun peeked out from the window and shone upon his face. In a word, it was beautiful. But to Bakura…

It was his reason for living.

Just to see Marik, breathing in and out. Bakura didn't need anything else; suddenly he was more sure than ever of his decision. Marik loved him, true, it must be difficult at times, but he did anyway.

His doubt somehow just disappeared as he looked on the sleeping face. Marik would never leave him; they were the same, both born into a harsh world, seeking revenge. Who knew tracking a millenium item could have changed his life so entirely? Not for the item, but the stupid teenager on a motorcycle that very well could have run Bakura over.

_That blond brat_. Bakura chuckled, sure he actually ran _in front_ of the bike to get Marik's attention, but everything after that had just wrapped Bakura around Marik's little finger and there was no getting out of it.

_Now, how to do this? _

Bakura slowly got up from the bed, careful not to disturb Marik; he needed to clear his head. He got dressed and put on his coat as he made his way to the roof of the building, it was raining, but he didn't care. He stared up at the sky, letting the droplets hit his face, he decided.

Maybe he didn't actually need to _say _it.

_Ra I'm a genius_.

He ran back into the apartment, only to find that Marik had already gone out, he had said he was going to see his brother and sister today. Bakura grinned and thanked the gods for his luck, now he could get everything together. He grabbed his trench coat and ran out the door. He had to walk (or run because of his rush) because Marik had taken his motorbike and Bakura didn't drive.

When he made it to the grocery store the staff paled. "Oh god, he's back"

Some ended up hiding behind their counters.

Some (including the manager) ran away screaming.

Needless to say, Bakura's last visit didn't go so well. It involved… pineapples… Bakura doesn't like pineapples…

Anyway, the man gathered up all of the supplies he needed and proceeded out the door.

"Hey! Aren't you gonna pay for that?!" One of the newer and more stupid cashiers asked.

Bakura only laughed and went home.

When he got back Marik still wasn't there. So Bakura got to work. He had to do this right, or he was screwed.

He began searching the cupboards for the things he would need.

_Eggs, butter, milk, frosting… hm_? He saw the apron Marik used whenever he wanted to bake. It was a simple lavender apron. Bakura chuckled for a moment at Marik's obsession for the colour and decided it was probably best to put it on.

**_About an hour later_****…**

"Look, I know we've had our differences in the past. But this is important, I need your commitment or this won't work. Got that?"

He continued.

"… I know we're both at our breaking point here, I guess we're not so different, so I'm going to need you to help me out here alright?"

Bakura sat at the kitchen counter, mixing bowl filled with instant cake mix, and about a dozen broken eggs on the floor and table.

He narrowed his eyes at his last remaining eggs.

"So this is going to work now…got it?"

The eggs didn't respond.

"Good, now let's get started"

But to Bakura I guess they did.

He reached forward and picked up one of the last two eggs and held it by the bowl to break it.

"I can do this…"

**One hour later**

"I can totally do this…"

**30 minutes later**

"f*** it I can't do this"

**Another hour later.**

"Oh, mister egg, you're so strong and brave" One egg began in a high pitched voice.

"Don't worry baby, I'll always protect you." The other had a very deep voice.

"But, what about the evil (and handsome) monster Bakura?"

The second egg shivered.

"Yes, he is greater than all of us, and he is better looking than I could ever be because I am a frustrating egg that won't break without chipping first…"

"Also, if eggs had penises, mine would be very small."

"You're such a loser, I'm leaving you!" The high pitched voice began again.

"I hate you"

"Oh, no. Now I'm all alone now that she left me. I might as well die and become part of a sugary mixture of flour and water."

RRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGGG!

The phone rang and Bakura snapped out of his game, he put the eggs down and went to answer the phone.

Only he forgot to change his voice back so he sounded like Mrs. Egg.

"Hello?"

"Bakura? What's wrong with your voice?"

_Oh shit_, "Erm, ahem, no- nothing. Just a sore throat."

"…You know what? I don't wanna know. I just called to say I'll be home in about an hour, I couldn't find my key this morning so you're gonna have to buzz me in."

"Huh? Oh yeah sure." He slid Marik's key out of his pocket and threw it across the room. "See you later."

"Bye"

Click

"Uh oh."

The thief looked around at the kitchen, he hadn't started baking, or cleaning or…

He looked at the eggs

Anything really…

He raced to the kitchen and started to mix ingredients together; he finally managed to break the eggs (with some shells left in) and put them in the oven.

The clock was ticking now, Marik would be home soon. The idea was to make the cupcakes, ice them, then write "Will you marry me?" with one letter on each one. He scrambled to put the mix of whatever he managed to make in the oven and waited. He sat cross legged in front of the oven, just trying to will the cakes to rise.

After about half an hour they were ready.

"Right, I have 30 minutes to do this- Ahhhh!" He had burned himself on the pan.

His eyes began to twitch but there was no turning back now, he had to finish what he started.

He grabbed a knife and started to cover the cupcakes.

"Why do these Ra damned things keep melting?! I'm just trying to make these bloody cupcakes!" He managed to start the lettering after letting them cool off a bit more, just about ready to snap, he finished the "y" in marry, about to snap at the same time he was ready to jump for joy.

He was going to finish!

He was going to make it!

All he had to do was finish the last word!

He reached over for another cupcake…

"Oh hell no."

"Nope, that didn't happen, when I look over there is going to be plenty more and I am going to finish"

He looked over and the tray was empty.

He had been in such a rush he didn't count out how many he needed and…

"A ha, haha…HAHAHAHA!"

SNNNAAAPPPP

"Are you fu***** kidding me!?"

His voice lowered to a whisper.

"There's no more eggs… I can't make anymore, maybe I can go buy-"

RIIINNGGG

"…Hello?" Bakura's eye was still twitching and he was just about ready for murder/suicide at this point.

"Hey, Bakura I'm back, open the front door."

His next words were a deadly kind of calm.

"Okay, sure."

The white haired man lowered the phone onto the receiver and walked back over to the kitchen. He figured he had two options.

1) Jump out the window and die, then all of this would be over…

But then Marik would still know, even if he threw them away Marik would eventually see them… Not to mention the fact that he was immortal.

And option 2…

The blond parked his motorbike and walked upstairs. "Bakura seemed really… off today, I wonder if something's wrong?"

He opened the door and gasped, the kitchen was a mess. There were eggs everywhere, flour managed to get stuck on the ceiling, and a odd looking thing that Marik thought it would be best not to touch.

"Bakura? Where are you?"

He walked into their living room to find the man lying on the couch, motionless.

"Bakura? Are you okay?"

No response.

He decided to poke his bloated stomach and the thief groaned.

It was then that Marik got a good look at him. His pants had burst, there was icing all over his face, some bits had even gotten in his hair.

"What the hell have you been doing all day?!"

"Hmmm, grmmm"

Marik just stood there, waiting for a coherent response, but then realized the other's breathing had evened out.

_He fell asleep_? _Really_?

He got his boyfriend a blanket and wiped his face for him. "I guess he deserves a relaxing day every once in a while."

Attempt 2:

Failed

* * *

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

Review Please! I have THE BIGGEST chapter ever that I've been working on and I'm probably going to be done soon, sorry about not updating in a while, but I'll have the next few chapters out soon I promise. (Sorry if this wasn't a great chapter I've got a lot going on in my head and it's hard to be funny.)

Wow, this started out really nice at first... then the story just kinda... murdered all seriousness.


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